What the default rules leave out
New York's inheritance rules apply to spouses and relatives, so an unmarried partner generally receives nothing from an estate when there is no will. A surviving partner also has no right of election and no automatic claim to stay in a home titled in the other person's name. The state does not allow common-law marriages to be formed here, although it can recognize one validly formed in a place that permits it. Relatives who have been distant for years can end up with priority to inherit and to serve as administrator. These gaps can be closed, but closing them takes deliberate documents.
Ownership and paperwork to review
Look at how your home is titled and whether co-ownership includes a right of survivorship, because the deed wording decides whether the surviving owner takes the whole property. Check beneficiary designations on retirement accounts and insurance, which can name a partner directly. Signing a health care proxy and a power of attorney lets your partner act for you during an illness, rather than leaving hospitals and banks to sort out who should decide. Bring any cohabitation agreement, records of who contributed to major purchases, and information about children either of you has. If you are registered as domestic partners, bring that paperwork as well, though registration does not carry the same inheritance rights as marriage.
Topics a first meeting covers
We start with what each of you wants the other to have and what you want to go elsewhere, such as to children or other family. Taxes deserve attention because the marital deduction that lets spouses leave each other property free of estate tax does not apply to unmarried partners. We also talk about whether marriage would change the calculation for you, without suggesting that it should. If family members may object, we discuss how to make documents harder to challenge, including how they are signed and witnessed. A plan for unmarried couples often has to be revisited if the relationship ends, so we cover that too.
